Many people have felt the subtle pressure to be “man enough” or “woman enough” in the eyes of others. And research has shown this pressure can have personal and social consequences.
When men feel their manhood is challenged, they can respond with compensatory aggression and other harmful behaviors. When women step outside stereotypical femininity – or even just consider doing so – they often receive backlash.
As researchers who study how gender stereotypes and norms affect people in often unexpected ways, we wondered about the processes by which children feel motivated to conform to stereotypical gender norms. When does this start, and how might it manifest?
In recently published research we conducted with our colleague Andrei Cimpian, we found that when children perceive that their sense of being a “normal” or “proper” member of their gender group is threatened, they feel pushed to conform to stereotypical gender roles in different ways, with lasting consequences.
Children begin learning how to negotiate gender stereotypes and norms early on.
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Girl questions and boy questions
Borrowing from research on adults, we decided that the best way to assess children’s motivation to conform to gender norms was to challenge their status as a “typical” member of their gender group.
To do this, we asked 147 children ages 5 to 10 in New York City to play two games: a “Girl Questions Game” and a “Boy Questions Game.” Each featured difficult trivia about topics that are stereotypically gendered, such as “Which of these flowers is a poppy flower?” (Girl Questions Game) and “Which of these football teams was the 2016 champion?” (Boy Questions Game).
We randomly assigned children to receive feedback suggesting their performance was either gender-typical or gender-atypical, the latter of which was our version of a threat to their gender conformity. For example, a boy in this threat condition received feedback that he had aced the Girl Questions Game but flopped the Boy Questions Game.
Next, we assessed how they responded to this feedback. Would the boy publicly share or hide his achievement in a “Girl Questions Game Book of Winners”? Would he proudly wear a “Girl Questions Game Winner” sticker, or would he prefer to switch stickers? Would he be worried about what his peers would think?
Responding to gender conformity threats
We found three distinct ways children responded to threats to their gender conformity.
First, girls and boys of all ages were extra concerned about not fitting in with their gender group. This means they anticipated more rejection from their peers and reported lower self-esteem.
Second, certain children actively tried to demonstrate that they fit in with their gender group. Younger girls ratcheted up their femininity, while older boys ratcheted up their masculinity. For example, older boys would…
